THIS IS HAPPY / EMO POST

i was emo-ing away last night till morning
i dreamt that i died and i have so many things yet to accomplished
i have yet to fall really deeply in love, get married , have kids, fufill my ambition as an air stewardess , open a matchmaking co. , know God better and so on... and i just died while sleeping i mean its good to die just like that u dont have to go through so much pain like having to be put on numerous drips all over one's body
suddenly i felt that im not making full use of my life
im always so mean to pple and bullying all my closefriends ard me
yea im critical i love being sadistic and sarcastic seeing pple get drown i will just burst out laughing ok im not that mean
im so sorry if i hurt anyone indirectly but all those stuffs i said i really dont mean it at all
sherrie is not evil and renee is not fat she's skinny like skinny jeans and suann is not a ball of lard she's like a ball of wool

i miss my classmates i miss my sec sch days, i miss chew hse, peerlite my cca ...everything yet im so happy seeing all my friends so settled down in jc life im really glad they found better friends like me showering then with their love and concern unlike me always scolding and disturbing/bullying them
and i knw that i have to move on in life and stop being so annoying and not open up to pple
sigh i always take things for granted...sorry im very sad now and its not the usual ''amandal is blogging crap today scenario''